I was a man for a day. Not literally but mentally. I was able to sit down and have a deep conversation with several of my male associates. I got answers to many of my burning questions.
Have you cheated before?
Not surprised by the amount of “yes” I received. I was surprised by the people that said it because 8 out of 10 of them admitted to cheating on their current spouse… I’m talking relationships of 3+ years. These are some relationships that I used to envy. I guess everything that glitters ain’t gold.
Do you regret what you did?
Absolutely not. Everyone said it was worth it.
A bit of a sad response but once again, I’m not surprised.
Why did you cheat?
Many did it because of their unhappiness and dissatisfaction with their spouse. One said he cheated because he wanted to “get it out of his system before he got married”. Get what out of your system? The foundation you’re laying is rocky. You’re trying to build a relationship out of lies and unfaithfulness. Say the woman never finds out that you’re cheating and you get married, is it really going to be that easy to cut off a lifestyle you’ve had for months (maybe years) all because you have a ring on your finger?
I had a few say that they just loved to have sex. Okay, so what was your partner not doing to help satisfy your needs? Did you express that to them or did you expect them to figure it out on their own? Communication is key, guys.
Another interesting answer was that his woman “liked to be in control of everything and never let him be a man” so he “found someone who gave him his balls back”.
L – O – L.
Now I understand the whole pride thing. A lot of men feel the need to run the sh*t show. They want women to be submissive to them, be their yes man. That’s fine and all…. when you have a man who is able to handle that type of control. Some men can’t.
Good example is my ex. He tried and all he did was run our lives into a black hole. Our finances? Shambles. Our living situation? A fucking nightmare. Every time I gave him an inch of hope, he dragged us out a whole mile into nothingness. It was embarrassing. He didn’t have a mind of his own, he couldn’t handle his own life much less handle two others as well. He wasn’t ready to be “the man of the house” so I had to step up and fill shoes he was nowhere near fitting.
I think men and women forget that sometimes relationships fail because of our own flaws. It’s so easy to put the blame on others that sometimes we forget to analyze our own actions.
What do you bring to the table? Maybe the reason behind your unhappiness in a relationship stems from the lack of resources you provide.