The Life of a Young Mama

weekly blog about a mom of two.

Milf. 2.0 — November 27, 2016

Milf. 2.0

One day you wake and decide you want to do something crazy like drive across the country with $5 to your name… but since I’m not that big of a dare devil I decided to chop off  all my hair. This isn’t something new for me, I cut my hair off a couple times before. Only this time around it’s much shorter and I’m keeping it like this for a while, I’m thinking 5+ years.

I first decided to do the big chop about 5 years ago when I broke up with my high school love. We went through DRAMA.. years of drama and I felt like my hair needed to go along with him. I loved it back then but quickly missed the look of longer hair so I grew it back out. After having Jaylen in 2013, my hair basically fell out of my head because of lack of vitamins and nutrients. I didn’t really have much of a choice but to cut it or walk around with bald spots. I wanted to keep the short look but my ex (their father) wanted me to grow it back out.Maybe the short hair made him question his own masculinity? LOL.

Anyways, his wish came true. My hair quickly grew back because at the time I couldn’t afford to visit the hair salon every two weeks to maintain the short do.

Fast forward to a couple of weeks ago…

I honestly looked at myself in the mirror.. admired my new body and the amount of weight I lost over the last few weeks… and something just seemed off. I felt like I didn’t look like myself. So I made an appointment and put my head in the hands of a professional.

I AB-SO-LUT-ELY LOVE my new look. I feel amazing. I feel like a 24-year old woman. My confidence level is on 100. And the amount of attention I’m receiving is definitely unexpected. I’m in love with the new me.

“Do more of what makes you happy.”

picture1
LEFT: Before the big chop and midway through my weight loss journey,                             RIGHT: After the big chop

 

 

picture2

 

So thankful. — November 25, 2016

So thankful.

The past two weeks have honestly taken the top spot of my favorite moments in 2016.

Starting off with my birthday, which really didn’t go as planned. I had fun… maybe too much fun but it was TOTALLY worth it. The day of my birthday was spent with two of my favorite people, my mom and one of my best friends. We went to Painting With A Twist and instantly became artists. I was showered with love the entire day as soon as the clock hit 12:00 am. That day made me realize how many people I have supporting me and loving me, even people that I don’t really communicate with on a regular basis.

The following Saturday, I went out with one of my good friends. It was like a sequel of the hangover… we just won’t talk about it. LOL

The next day, I spent preparing for my pharmacy tech exam. I’ve been studying for this exam since June of this year. A lot was riding on whether I passed this exam or not. If I didn’t pass, I knew I was going to wake up the next day without a job… the feeling of the unknown was eating me alive.

I walked into the testing facility sweating bullets. I honestly wanted to shit my pants. I only shared with a few people that I was taking the exam that night because I feared the possibility of failure.

But guess what…

I made that exam my B****H. (Sorry not sorry for the explicit.)

I fell to the ground with buckets of happy tears rolling out of my eyes when I saw the word PASS on my screen. Two days later and it STILL feels unreal.

I AM SO RELIEVED.

I can do nothing but thank God! Thank him for helping me to retain the information that I studied over these last few months.

I can’t lie… the test was HARD. Extremely challenging. My confidence level was brought all the way back to reality during the exam. But it’s over now and I could not be happier.

This thanksgiving, I am thankful for my amazing support system. My immediate family, my friends, my AMAZING co-workers, and of course my two boys. I am thankful for God allowing me to be blessed with this great group of individuals.I am also very thankful to be out for the toxic situation I was in earlier this year. My blessings have been flowing ever since.

I know it’s hard to reflect and look at the positives from this year, especially after enduring such a controversial election… an election that brought out the ugly in everyone. But try it. Try to sit down and really appreciate and be thankful for the blessings you have received this year.

Happy thanksgiving everyone from my family to yours.

picture1

Another year… — November 15, 2016

Another year…

Today is the day.

Today is MY day.

Anyone who knows me knows that November 15th is at the top of my favorite days of the year.

This past year was eventful. Twenty-three was a GREAT one. I gained a lot and lost a little. I learned a lot, achieved way more than expected, cleaned up my friend’s list, and lived my life EXACTLY how I wanted to.

I am beyond BLESSED! I honestly cannot complain. I am happy. I am content. I am full of life.

Twenty-four will be even better. I want to explore the world and continue to break down the walls I have built up. I want to continue to be the best, bad a** mom I can be. I want to continue to strive for greatness!

Happy birthday to me!

giphy-2

Never will I ever.. — November 11, 2016

Never will I ever..

This past election has completely changed our world, changed my views of the world I live in, and changed my opinion about a LOT of people.

Before I begin my rant of the hour, I want whoever is reading this to RESPECT my opinion. If you do not agree with what I have to say, I openly invite you to comment. But do not, I repeat, DO NOT disrespect me. Also, I will not argue with you about how I feel and the same goes when the tables are turned…

This election… this decision America collectively made early Wednesday morning set us back 50+ years. Yes, Trump is a white, privileged, heartless, and ungrateful asshole. EVERYONE knows that. But he is only one man who, just a few days ago, had little to no power. We had the opportunity to not fall for his antics, not give him the attention he was seeking… but WE failed. We have failed ourselves and we have failed others.

It’s sad that some Americans would rather vote for a disrespectful bigot than see a woman in charge. It’s sad that we even let someone of such character even get this far! This man brought out the ugly in everyone whether you were a supporter or opposer. He channeled the stupidity and ignorance in their souls.

President Obama broke down so many barriers in our world. He opened up doors that seemed sealed shut. He gave us all hope that ANYTHING can happen if you set your mind to do it. He was our voice of reason, he was a breath of fresh air.

America has poisoned themselves. Other countries have threatened to disown us, go to war against us… even allies want to leave us high and dry.

Trump wants to make the rich richer, he could care two sh*ts about the poor. And when I say poor, I don’t mean the homeless man on the street or the mom of three working minimum wage. When I say poor, I mean US… YOU. Every middle class American is POOR in his eyes. We are not on the same level as him and he will take action to make sure it stays that way.

This is not a black or white issue. This is not a man or woman issue. This is blatant disrespect. This is punishment for letting a man who valued everyone and fought for JUSTICE and EQUALITY, working hard to make things happen that we didn’t think was possible.

America was not perfect before or during President Obama terms. Believe me, we had a LONG way to go. But we were making steps in the right direction!

I am disappointed in America. I am disgusted to be called an American. This is humiliating.

I will never call that man my president.

Now or ever.

160526_3042459_President_Trump.jpg

Slept with the devil. — November 5, 2016

Slept with the devil.

This world is full of many different kinds of people. Sometimes you can see someone’s true colors from day one, but many others take a while before the real starts to surface. Growing up my mom always said “be careful who you call a friend”.. and I rolled my eyes every time I heard it. When I became an adult and started to experience REAL problems, I finally decided that maybe my mom was right after all?!

I slept with the devil and now I get burned every day of my life. I slept with someone who I thought was heaven sent. I kept saying to myself “God picked this man for me”OH BOY was I wrong!

I always try to find the good in everyone but I literally can’t find it in this one. One minute I think I found something and then 2 seconds later, I’m proved once again why I’m wrong.

This demon has emotionally abused me to the point where I have considered doing things that are out of my character and morals. It’s gotten to the point that now he’s “trying” to take away two of my most precious items, my valuable gems.

When will this stop? 

This demon wants to see me suffer. It wants to bring pain into my life. This demon is battling their own personal demons and wants to bring their hurt onto other people. The smile I carry on my face every day is a threat to them.

The scariest thing in life is not knowing someone’s true intentions. They could be a miracle in disguise or a person trying to break you down by every mean necessary. Be careful who you let into your world. Be careful about the decisions you make.

We’re human so we’re bound to run into a demon every now and then. But remember demons don’t live on forever. They become weak when they don’t have someone’s attention and energy. Demons ALWAYS disappear.

raw.gif

Granny status. — November 2, 2016

Granny status.

A lot of people my age are just getting started in their careers. They’re getting married, in a serious relationship, or single and have no intentions on changing that anytime soon. A few others are  traveling in and out of the country, trying to take on as much of the world as possible before they have kids. Then there’s that small group of people who literally live life on the edge with no care in the world. Partying every weekend, making poor decisions… literally, YOLO is their current life motto.

I, on the other hand, am in a totally different place than my fellow peers. I feel older than I really am. I realized this a couple of weeks ago when I went out with a group of people. Everyone was “turning up” and I was just like “blah“. I did enjoy the night overall but I guess my idea of going out is very different than most. I no longer enjoy the rough, provocative dancing I once did in my previous years of college. I don’t smoke and my idea of drinking is sipping on cognac instead of taking back to back shots. I’d rather go to a mix and mingle event instead of a packed out party where I can hardly breathe.

I rarely go out, though. I love the feeling of being home. I’m gone for 40+ hours during the week so when I actually get the chance to sit down and enjoy the house that I pay for every month, I take it.

My non-mommy friends joke and call me a granny, but I don’t take it personally. I love my granny life! Every once in awhile, I check back into 23-year-old me and let loose.

When you have kids, you have to think about them and how the decisions you make will affect them. EVERYTHING you do will affect them in some way. Even if you don’t have kids, you still mature and grow out of the things that once brought excitement into your life. It’s a part of life. So don’t feel bad the next time your friend’s make fun of you for taking a nap on a Saturday afternoon or binge watching your favorite show with a bottle of wine… if that’s what make you happy, then DO IT. 🙂

giphy-1